Let’s get real for a minute. Have you ever caught yourself wondering, Why am I like this? Why do I react the way I do? Maybe you’ve been stuck in the same patterns or feeling like something is holding you back, and no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to figure out what’s really going on. 

I’ve been there. It’s frustrating. You can read all the self-help books and listen to all the motivational podcasts, but sometimes, you need to dig deeper.

And I mean deeper than surface-level stuff like "set goals" or "stay positive." That’s where inner child work and shadow work come in—and trust me, this is where the magic happens. 

What’s Inner Child Work? 

Okay, picture this: inside of you, there’s this little version of yourself. It’s the part of you that remembers all the good, bad, and messy moments from when you were growing up. That "inner child" carries your joys, your traumas, and even those things you’ve tried to bury because they hurt too much. 

When you ignore that little kid inside you, it’s like putting a band-aid over a deep cut—it might cover it up for a while, but the wound doesn’t heal. Inner child work is about reconnecting with that part of yourself, giving it the love and attention it didn’t get when it needed it most. 

What About Shadow Work? 

Shadow work is like looking at the parts of yourself you’d rather not admit exist—the anger, the fear, the jealousy, the insecurity. These "shadows" are usually the parts of us we learned to hide because someone told us they weren’t okay to feel. 

But here’s the kicker: ignoring those shadows doesn’t make them disappear. They just sit there, running the show from behind the scenes. Ever notice how you keep reacting the same way to certain situations, even when you know it’s not helping? That’s your shadow at work. 

Shadow work is about shining a light on those hidden parts of yourself, understanding them, and accepting them instead of fighting them. 

Why It’s Worth It 

Doing this kind of work can be messy. It’s not always fun to look back on your childhood or face the darker parts of yourself. But if you’re feeling stuck in life—like no matter what you do, you’re spinning your wheels—this could be the key to finally moving forward. 

Think about it like this: You wouldn’t try to fix your car without first figuring out what’s wrong under the hood, right? Inner child work and shadow work are like giving yourself a tune-up. You get to uncover what’s really going on, heal the old stuff, and start showing up as the best version of yourself. 

How to Get Started 

• Get Curious: Start asking yourself questions like, "What did I need as a kid that I didn’t get?" or "What triggers me, and why?" 

• Write It Out: Journaling is a great way to let those feelings and memories flow. Don’t judge what comes up—just let it out. 

• Meditate or Visualize: Spend some quiet time imagining yourself as a little kid. What do they need to hear from you right now? 

• Talk to Someone: Sometimes it helps to have someone guide you through the process. 

Final Thoughts 

You don’t have to stay stuck. You don’t have to keep wondering why you are the way you are without finding answers. Inner child work and shadow work might feel a little scary at first, but the freedom and clarity you’ll gain are so worth it. 

So, let me ask you again: Have you ever wondered why you are the way you are? Maybe it’s time to stop wondering and start exploring. You just might surprise yourself with what you find.